Wonder

As I mentioned in another post, I gave Dalton a telescope for Christmas this year. It really did turn out to be a good gift---it seems like he really enjoys it. I have seen many pictures of space and looked at the stars on a clear night, but it never really affected me except for the occasional falling star or the small red spot in the sky that claims to be Mars. But then, I looked through this telescope and was blown away. The first thing that Dalton showed me was Saturn. That was ridiculous, you could see the ring around it and everything.

Having never been one to sit and contemplate space, it always has been something that has been there and I know that it is big---but I never really THOUGHT about the extent of it all. It's HUGE. I cannot comprehend the enormity of space. Looking at Saturn I got a little knot in my stomach and heard a little voice say, "yep, you really are that small and so insignificant in the grand scheme of things". I was actually looking at a planet, it wasn't just a little sticker on the end of the telescope, it was real.

I am one that believes that everybody is significant in their own right and that everybody has a purpose for being here. I absolutely believe in God. As a matter of fact, after looking at space I am even more convinced. For me, the more I see of the world and now out into the galaxy, I cannot fathom how all of these beautiful things that exist could not have been created. Or rather, how they could have just appeared and worked so perfectly. I have heard the saying, "It takes more faith to not believe in a creator than to believe in one." Absolutely.

Not only seeing space and mountains, and flowers and fish and animals and humans (the list could go on...), but now having lived a little bit more life and experiencing things it even strengthens my faith in some sort of a higher power. To be able to feel the kind of love that I feel for people in my life, to have such an intricate personality, to connect with other people's intricate personalities, to have thoughts and dreams and every emotion in the book----- life is incredible, in every form. To me, that cannot just have popped up out of nowhere without any significance.

My beliefs are always evolving, at this point in my life I have stepped out of the box of organized religion and started to do some real "soul-searching" on my own. I often think that God is up there going, "Everybody just sit back and enjoy what I have given you----it's not all that serious!" I also don't think that we were ever supposed to "figure it all out". Some people are so sure that there is absolutely no God, and some are absolutely certain that there is a God -- but they have taken the mystery out of this God, they are sure that they know exactly how he feels about every issue in the world, how they are going to get to heaven, how he judges people who "sin". I have stopped doing that. I no longer believe that it is as cut and dry as that.

I will never claim to know it all when it comes to God. I have come to some conclusions, but they may change. I do know that I have been given an extremely curious mind, and since I believe there is a purpose for everything I think it would be a waste to take my curious mind and shove it into a box and keep it there without budging.

I'm sorry, I'm getting a little philosophical. It's just a weird thought that here I am, sitting at a little computer desk typing, while somewhere out in space Saturn is just hanging out. It's real. Space is really out there, full of as much mystery and truth as any person, animal, plant or God out there.